This is a drawing I did in a sketchbook on 1 April 1981. At the time I was an undergraduate, in my mid-twenties, and had not yet discovered writing as my ultimate source of expression. I was double-majoring in Art and English.
The drawing, a self-portrait, is called "April Fool." I felt like a fool and made myself look like one because I had no idea where I was going. I was married with two children, and I was coming to an awareness that I would never be the artist I had hoped to be. I just wasn't good enough. I loved my literature classes, but what could I do with that to make a living?
The hands definitely express the idea that I was feeling trapped, pressed down by expectations (real and some possibly imagined).
2 comments:
What a powerful image, Theresa. The hands are as big as (or bigger than) you are. It surely expresses something deep. Thank you for sharing this intimate portarait.
I look at the crossed hands and see worth being blocked. I wish it were a simple matter of confidence because in all that there are simple cures ... #1 being "nice" to oneself.
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